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im moving to instagram, i'll put all my new pictures there. if you feel like it, you can take a look over there

i doubt i'll upload anymore pictures here. maybe when i got the time, but who knows. 
yep. finally decided to take the big step. after my last trip, i found out that my camera and lens isn't enough , its canon s95 without any strobes or lens  , i decided to get into mode details and sometimes i would spend a lot of time on the same subject, still when i take out the pictures, some of them weren't enough..

i decided to get the olympus omd, with nauticam housing, 60mm macro lense , +10 diopter and the rest of the accessories. 

its really fucking expensive, but i think it'll be worth it :) been using the compact camera for 4 years now, i think its now to move on to another camera.

thank you canon s95 :_(
im gonna need to take care of few things , so i might be slow in checking your work , i will when i got a bit of time, but i promise i'll check it out , sooner or later :)
well, this idiot really ruined my mood , i was kinda messing with my wacom a bit , trying to sketch and draw and even ink some of the sketches, i noticed that my pen stroke was horrible , i didnt know if i would mess up with the default settings, use custom brushes or so on, so i asked him what kinda settings he has for the brush/pen configuration ... i got a wonderful reply "I AM NOT TECHNICAL SUPPORT" :jawdrop: , but oh well, he's really famous so i guess its celebrities trend these days.

i told him "thanks" and unwatched him , i really hate artist with a fucked up attitude -.-'
Being alone makes me think of everything I don't want to think of,  makes me think about the past and the things that I Miss the most,  the people I had in my life,  wishes I couldn't make  true

I miss the old days when people were innocent,  I miss  the old days when people were honest,  I miss the old days when no one would  stab you in the back,  I miss the old days when people were romantic , I miss the old days when people used to care, I miss  the old days when everyone was simple and happy.

I miss being innocent, I miss not being lied to ,  I miss having my back free of stabs, I miss having the thrill of romance in my life and be loved,  I miss having someone who cares , I miss  being simple and happy.. .....

Being alone makes me think of all the things I used to miss but it also reminds me of why I would never go back to the person I was again and grasp the things I miss the most in my life
  • Listening to: be free - Papa roach
  • Reading: this journal
  • Watching: the blank walls
  • Playing: ....
  • Eating: ....
  • Drinking: Cola
im really sorry that i haven't been replying my msgs, or thanking those wonderful people who are adding my pics to their collection , it makes me happy to know someone likes the pictures i took although they're beginner's pictures. i will reply every msg :D i dont like ignoring people..

yesterday i got a call in the morning from work, they say that im allowed to continue studying while still keeping my job , i've been applying every year since i got the job its been 8 years , even though i work with computers, my major is mechanical engines/turbines/boilers. im really glad that i will get a chance to get better and of course get a better payment although my salary will be cut in 1/2 , so it'll be kinda tough but it'll pay off after im done. its still not 100% , i still have to contact some colleges , i have to travel tomorrow to another country and get my old subjects that i studied and old certificates.

casting that aside, im sorry for not posting any new pictures, my computer really sucks only 2gb ram, 2.0 ghz core duo and 150gb harddisk which is almost full :P

i ordered a new computer so once it gets here :) i'll start working on it. trust me you'll love the pictures :D

thanks for reading :D

Nude = Bad?

Journal Entry: Fri Jun 22, 2012, 8:44 AM

Hmm, Im having some side effects after coming back from my last trip. i always use my trips to review what i have in my life, the mistakes i have done, what needs to be changed? im just listening to old music, alone and thinking.

is nudity bad? why do people keep judging just because a girl took off her shirt or walk naked? why am i being called a pervert when im looking at nude girls? i mean they're naked infront of my eyes, they're beautiful and they dont mind you looking so why am i the bad one?  is it bad for a person to feel good about his/her body and sexuality?

i do talked to a lot of girls who'd go topless on webcam or walk naked around , i find that quite amusing, i really love the female body , not sexually, but i know a girl in my country who kept trying to have a relationship with me , but i didn't agree since im married (even though its an arranged marriage) , but i'd rather not sleep with women in my country.. anyways, once she's like "i wanna go naked and want you to take photographs of me" , i was like "omg,!! sure, when!" , she's like "you ass hole, you wouldn't sleep with me , but take photos of my naked body?" it was funny, but i enjoy pictures, specially the artistic creative ones , i love women taking care of their body, being proud of their body and love it..

sadly i find it weird that some of the girls change, as if they had a "wake up" call
like they feel guilty or bad after enjoying what they did in the past. which brings me to the question why?
is it really bad being nude? i never judge or change the way i talk unless they request it. i find it awkward when people change even though everything change in this world whether its for better or worse. its just sad getting close to someone, after totally breaking off the ice , they start building wall bricks again , so when you become formal, they become cold. *shakes head*  after things become dull and cold , i just stop talking to them. i think its the right thing to do. cuz apparently i remind them of a mistake.

so, i wonder if i should give people a chance to get to know me and get close to them or should i keep building a wall and never let anyone in. if people in my society are ok with nudity, i would've become a nude photographer thats for sure hehehe.
but i guess i'll start learning how to draw from now on and maybe i'll come up with some good work.

sorry for ranting , i just wanned to share some thoughts "not that alot of people read this crap" .

  • Listening to: Liberate your mind - Disturbed
  • Reading: Thoughts in my head
  • Watching: Laptop screen
  • Playing: With my balls - just kidding -.-
  • Eating: Snickers ice-cream , its good :P
  • Drinking: Water

I'm back...

Journal Entry: Sun Jun 17, 2012, 9:57 AM
Well, just wanned to say that im back from my journey in sharm al sheikh . it was a wonderful experience and i loved it.

i was taking underwater photography course , the group was wonderful and the class was really great. the instructor (Paul Duxfield) was a great guy, down to earth and never got bored from us asking questions all the time.

im happy and proud with some of the images i took although some of them are out of focus (i apologize for that) but i'll put whatever  i find nice and hope you'll like them.

the other new thing i learned in the class was "light room" , im totally shocked on how easy it was to fix the white balance, and give more colors to the picture :) so im thinking about re-editing my whole images through lightroom.

yep its gonna be a long time before i finish everything, but lets hope i can do it.

tagged by :iconaaronjjenkins:

1) Pick an OC (Original character.. I just did it on myself)
2) State ten facts about them.
3) Answer five questions and give your victims five new questions
4) Tag five people and go to their profiles to tell them they have been tagged.
5) No tag backs

ten facts about myself.. hmm

1) i have 3 sacred things in life. sex,sleep and food.
2) im a fun nice person regardless to my face looking like a serial killer :P
3) im always late for work -.-
4) i get bored way too fast -.-
5) i love all kind of animals and insects with few exceptions (cockroaches,mosquitos and harmful ones)
6) not proud of it, but i am a pervert :P
7) if i get a dildo everytime someone calls me crazy, i'd be building a huge castle with them >.>
8) i wish i could breath underwater and stay there all the time -.-
9) tom and jerry still crack me up!! yeah and road runner >.>
10) i dont like kids but i never say no to them thats why they always love me , i just find it unfair to make them sad at a young age, they'll have their share in life.

Questions from tagger:

1) If you have a fetish/fetishes, what is it/are they?
Boobs and women in nurse/school outfit >.>

2)Did you ever have a favourite toy as a child? If so, what was it?
yeah, voltran when u put those tigers together and create a super robot, was cool!! :P

3)What's your favourite item of clothing?

4)What are you most attracted to in a person?
personality / eyes / smile

5)What are you most afraid of?
growing too old and then be in need of people's help all the time, even when i have to pee -.- thats why i try to keep doing sports/workout just incase >.>

my questions :

1) if you had 3 wishes, what would you wish for?
2) do you have something you regret? if so, what is it
3) had anything you wished to be but couldn't achieve it? what is it?
4) what do you love the most?
5) what do you hate the most?

Giving up what you do for what you love.

Journal Entry: Sat May 5, 2012, 6:45 AM

Ok, i've been wanting to draw and make some painting for the longest time. But i never had the time or the talent to do so, ever since i joined this site, i started browsing and admiring whatever people make. so i decided to ask if even a person like me who stopped drawing for 15 years would be able to make something 1/2 good as what they make. Everyone said i can, so i purchased a wacom tablet and decided to start learning, the funny thing, i didn't have a problem  getting used to the  tablet. but as i started reading books/guides i realized its not an easy road.

so i had to make a decision , either sell the wacom and never think about drawing again , or stop programming and forget about game programming forever "not that im good at programming either" .. both of them need a lot of practice , both of them will get worse if you ignore them for a while. so its either left or right.

so i decided to give it a try and aim to draw.. stop programming from now on even though i've spent the last 3 years just learning how to program so if everything goes well, i'll probably start doing some character designing and other concept art.

"sighs" a new chapter has begun .. wish me luck.

it was someone's birthday on my list today, so i thought about being nice. guess what i said? "Happy birthday gorgeous" ..
well, i have to admit, i did get a thank you, then.. "next time just say happy birthday" .. and i ended up being blocked...

lol, am i really that scary? lol ... no further comment. thought i'd share that.

Life is ironic .

Journal Entry: Tue Mar 20, 2012, 7:30 AM

I woke up today, just doing what I usually do, heading for shower, brushing my teeth but before that I usually check on my "whatsapp" and see what funny things can bright my day.

A close relative has passed away in a car accident, a speeding car that passed the red light completely destroyed his car and he died instantly. the ironic part, he was going to a funeral.

I'm sorry if I hurt anyone or become super gloomy in the next few days.

I don't have anymore to say, I hope he rests in peace.

CSS and background by derelictvampire
First of all, happy new year everyone. may everything you guys do is successful filled with happiness. excuse my grammar mistakes since im not in school anymore and i dont feel like punctuating cuz its annoying .

i'd like to start with a words of thanks to my new friend Walt , who told me about this wonderful application which i didn't know about (Picasa 3)  , i used the auto correct (im feeling lucky) button, and it really did amazing work fixing the colors of my images, im even considering to re-upload everything all again after fixing the colors. so thanks a lot walt :D

as i start my new year , wishing everyone a new happy year, trying to cheer up those who didn't feel well. i started thinking , how can we make everyone happy? sadly we cant . however, here's a piece of advice, be content of what you have , if you were sick, then someone else might have cancer. if you're injured , someone else might have his leg / arm cut off. if your food sucks, someone else might never have something to eat and might even look for food in the trash. if you hate spending time with your friends or family, keep in mind there are people who are alone.

like i said, be content about what you have, be thankful that it could end up worse . be nice to people cuz what goes around comes back around , never forget about the past but use it to make you stronger. be optimistic and never stop doing what you love no matter what others tell you how stupid it is .

i dont wanna make this long , but all i wanna say, be happy , stay strong and enjoy life cuz you only live once, sooner or later you'll realize how old you've become and you've missed your chance. so stop worrying and go with your passion :)

sorry about blabbering, but i had to share some thoughts :)
"Sighs" ,  as a roam around, looking for 2d graphics designers / animators , i found out some interesting work, but none of what i had in mind  , not to mention a lot of them are underaged so i dont think its agood idea to contact them.

so i decided to just continue making my game using squares / rects / circles and add some glasses / mustaches to those shapes :P
until i find a talented person wants to work with me :)

i've only been here for two weeks . so its still early to find someone

nevertheless, if you're a 2d animator and draw japanese anime style , can do chibi / cartoonish drawings .
drop me a message , it'll be business. a comment or a note.

guess i'll upload couple of pictures. and continue working on it.
in my opinion? EYES DOCTOR!! .. today i had to visit the hospital cuz i had a big pimple on my eye led. so they had to remove it , it was so scary seeing them working on your eye as if you were abducted by aliens and they insert needles under you eye led -.- scary shit, but who's worse than him?  a stupid dentist who doesn't know his job , i had to go to a specialist , he took a look at my tooth, and then he said "we have to cut the gum to expose the tooth more for the crowning", after he cut it a bit, he discovered there was no tooth left and it was only the root, so he's like , sorry we can't save the tooth. (i didn't give a fuck about the tooth but why did i had to be cut) -.-

anyways, he calls another dentist , and they both agree that they should extract the tooth -.- , so now i suffer from extracted tooth, cut gum, and cut eye led .. i seriously hate drs. probably the only thing that was good about the dentist, the nurse was holding my head between her arms and slowly trying to calm me down with her gentle soft skin.  i think thats why i let the cut me to pieces.

anyways, i'll take some pain killers and go to sleep .. where are my sleeping pills!!!

gnite peeps and merry christmas, happy holidays.
after uploading the pictures of my dives, i never thought i'd get some people who actually love those pics, certainly they're not the best around. even though im not a pro while holding the camera, but when i see some pictures , i really feel like buying everything and go take shots. but then again, i prefer being underwater.

going through my album again, looking at the pics, made me wanna go dive again, even if its in the bathtub, i dont care, being underwater really calms me down. sadly, its too cold to go dive at the moments -.- and im kinda short on cash , its been 5 months since my last dive in the red sea, im seriously thinking of going back asap!!!!.

until then, i'll just go back, do my work... "sighs!!"
i mean, its seriously the sexiest language in the world. makes your purrrrr!! ... im drawn to it, even though i understand nothing of it >.>

i wanna go to brazil, i would've learned spanish, but then again they speak Portuguese . who knows, maybe someday it'll happen ... although i really doubt it.
i couldn't stop looking -.- i had to check out like 1008 pictures >.>
i seriously should go back to my project. well, i did get 50 favs. or something
talk about being picky!!

well... i'll probably check more pics tomorrow, but this time no nudies...

>.> i can't i think i will have to check all the nudies then move to another section.

bah, never mind, i'll start working... if only i can move from here and go to bed :P lol
today , i was talking to a friend of mine about finding a graphic designer for my 2d gaming project. which i am trying to make >.> so i found someone interesting, ended up making an account, before i know it , i decided to upload my trip pictures. i probably wont make any uploads, maybe old ones, who knows. i kinda feel guilty doing nothing, just browsing pictures , specially the nude ones , i should've worked on the project -.- , but lots of people have an amazing work. and i love how they treat their body artistically .although the trick that devianart did on me worked for the 1st 5 pictures that i uploaded >.> each time i upload a picture, i get an instant fav. i was like "WOAH!! someone likes my crappy picture right away??"... after 5 im like , damn .. automatic eh? , but then again some people actually did like them, thats why i decided to upload some of my fav.

i know the pictures are bad, but i have never held a camera for the "desire" to take pictures. i've always taken pictures of people since  i dont like taking pictures of myself. but when i bought the camera, it was solely for underwater. im planning to take underwater photography course soon , so the next set of pics will be a little bit better.

for now, guess i'll drop from time to time on this site. if you're interested in chatting, or in diving in general. dont hesitate to drop a line in my inbox.

preferably females "shrugs" no offense guys :P